Thursday, January 7, 2010

The Story of Hee and Shee

This is the story of Hee and Shee or Shee and Hee (scared of feminists I am at times :P).

Well, when Hee was a kid he liked toy guns and dinky cars and dad used to bring one whole pack of dinkies so that he didn’t have to buy them over and over again after Hee disintegrated –one dinky each day –the parts to see what was inside. Also, Hee collected trash dad threw away in the garbage can to get ‘spare parts’ out of them and ‘invent’ things. Sadly even though the interior of all the dinkies was the same Hee would still disintegrate them and no matter how much ‘useful trash’ he discovered, he wanted more; it would never be enough for his fantasies.

And when Shee was a kid, she loved kitchen sets, empty cosmetic kits, and dolls and mom used to bring one doll on each of her birthdays and on special occasions. She kept them in a special shelf and collected all the cloth left over after mom’s sewing to make dresses for her dolls. She also loved collecting things labelled trash by mom to make temporary homes for her dolls for her play sessions. Sadly, no matter how many dolls, left over cloth and trash would be there in her shelf, she’d still collect more and more; it would never be enough for her fantasies.

When Hee grew up he got popular with his buddies and they loved going out at night playing night matches, falling asleep somewhere in their cars for a few hours and then getting up early to watch the sun rise by the seaside enjoying the blissfully silent company of each other. Hee also liked taking short trips to his virtual fantasy land – stuff like GTA and CounterStrike seemed so cool with those shiny cars and shiny guns and yeah off course shiny plastic girls too.

And when Shee grew up she got popular with her ‘fairy-club’-friends and they loved sleeping over at each others places. Shee and her friends would stay up late cosily cuddled in their blankets and go on about things such as how to make the tastiest pizza with the least carbs. Shee also liked reading the Twilight Saga and watching Pride and Prejudice (1995) over and over again hoping to miraculously run into a Darcy or Edward in real life.

Then there came a time when two fat aunties who met each other at a painting exhibition decided to get their kids married to each other. Yeah, you guessed it right they were Shee’s and Hee’s moms.

So Shee and Hee were made to see and meet each other. And apparently they found themselves in luuurve with each other after the very first. They thought they had found exactly what they had been searching for.

After a couple of years, they were like strangers. They had been wronged –by their own selves. They had married the wrong person –some one not at all according to their ‘dreams’.

Actually Hee was nothing like the heroes that Shee had dreamed of; he couldn’t be caring, loving, romantic or even tidy enough (the benchmark being Edward!). In fact, he wasn’t even an average husband, let alone a lover. (PS. Husbands are exponential times boring versions of lovers; so she thought)

On the other hand Hee found out marriage something wasn’t he wanted to commit himself in the first place, let alone the fact that his wife was no where near the ‘hot-babes’ he saw while playing his adrenaline-rush-inducing games such as Tomb Raider and Duke Nukem:Planet of the babes.

They lived not really happily ever after just as many husbands and wives had done in the past fantasizing about two worlds which were poles apart from each other. In fact they never believed that an ever after was even something they were looking forward too.